My Dog Ate My Wallet!
Here’s something that may surprise you as much as it surprised me. It just so happens that, should your dog eat your money- paper money that is- the United States government will replace it. Yep, you read that correctly. That’s the part that’s the really good news. The not so good news is that, if your dog actually swallows those bills, you will have to retrieve the mutilated end product and clean it up a bit before sending it off to Uncle Sam for reimbursement.
Every year the United States Treasury Department reimburses more than 30 million dollars in response to approximately 30,000 mutilated currency claims. In order to qualify as “mutilated,” a bill must be less than one half of its original size and/or require special examination to determine its value.
In addition to damage caused by pets, the most common causes of mutilated currency include flooding, fire, insects, chemicals, and explosions. By the way, paper money is quite harmless to dogs when it is eaten, and it isn’t fully digested within the intestinal tract. In other words, it comes out resembling how it appeared when it was swallowed.
How to receive reimbursement
So, if your dog snatches your wallet and eats his grocery money, here are the steps to follow:
- Retrieve the remains of your money from your dog’s “bank deposit.”
- Clean up these remains to the best of your ability.
- Package this cleaned up end product and mail it to the Bureau of Engraving and Printing in Washington DC.
- Include a letter stating the estimated value of the currency and an explanation of how the currency became mutilated- “My dog at my wallet!”
Voila! Just like that, problem solved. Way to go United States Government! Wow, how refreshing is it to be able to say that!
What’s the craziest thing your dog ever ate?
Best wishes for the holidays,
Nancy Kay, DVM
Diplomate, American College of Veterinary Internal Medicine
Author of Speaking for Spot: Be the Advocate Your Dog Needs to Live a Happy, Healthy, Longer Life
Author of Your Dog’s Best Health: A Dozen Reasonable Things to Expect From Your Vet
Recipient, Leo K. Bustad Companion Animal Veterinarian of the Year Award
Recipient, American Animal Hospital Association Animal Welfare and Humane Ethics Award
Recipient, Dog Writers Association of America Award for Best Blog
Recipient, Eukanuba Canine Health Award
Recipient, AKC Club Publication Excellence Award
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Please visit http://www.speakingforspot.com to read excerpts from Speaking for Spot and Your Dog’s Best Health. There you will also find “Advocacy Aids”- helpful health forms you can download and use for your own dog, and a collection of published articles on advocating for your pet’s health. Speaking for Spot and Your Dog’s Best Health are available at http://www.speakingforspot.com, Amazon.com, local bookstores, and your favorite online book seller.